Yesterday I was gone. My brain wouldn't work. I was trying to do follow up work from a show I did the night before and I just couldn't get it together. This is when it dawned on me that I needed to give myself a break. Ya know, a break? When people stop for awhile and do something relaxing and maybe just “veg” out in front of TV or go to a bookstore or just for a walk?Because my mind is always going a zillion miles a minute, I CAN'T just take a break. I don't naturally do this. I have never naturally done this. Busy work. I always have to be busy. It's like that haunted house somewhere on the east coast where they have to keep building stuff to keep the spirits happy. I can tolerate the noise by keeping busy. ANYTHING. And what I do, I end up avoiding doing the stuff that really matters, or getting my brain to a state where it can totally handle doing the things that matter.
Not to say that I haven't been able to get things done. The times I HAVE done things, put my nose to the grindstone is usually when there is an actual DATED deadline and not just something written in a calendar but a real live commitment to something. When I have booked a show or made an appointment... those are things I can't ignore. It is important to make tangible deadlines, meaning actualy events that involve other people.
If I just say or write in my book, I am going to do this on Saturday... I have to get this done by this date... I have to mail this out. It won't be done or atleast it will be very hard to get it done. I have to start making deadlines and dates with myself so that I will keep them.
Part of the trick is to think of something fun to do in an area where I can also accomplish work related things. In the past I have spent a lot of time going out to coffee just to write. I have so many ideas and things written down and for whatever reason, however they were initiated they just remained things written. Any time I have called up and booked something whether it be an appointment or a gig, THEN it get's done.
Part of my ADHD is isolating myself. I don't want to deal with people. I am afraid to deal with people. I get overwhelmed with people. It isn't fun. I have to and want to break this habit and get out there, take the time to rest and restore and take the time to connect and make things happen.
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